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How to use this worksheet. Arguing well is only half of a debate. The other half is hearing what the other person actually said — not what you expected them to say. This sheet is about that half. Work through the parts in order; there is nothing to memorize.
PART 1
Why Listening Is Part of Arguing
Read this together before you start. Nothing to fill in here.
What good listening actually looks like
- You can say the other side's point back to them, and they agree that is what they meant.
- You notice which part of their argument is strongest, not just which part is easiest to attack.
- You let them finish. A point you interrupt is a point you did not hear.
Key idea: If you cannot say the other side's argument in your own words, you are not ready to answer it.
Two kinds of question
- A closed question gets a yes or a no. “Do you agree?”
- An open question gets a reason. “What made you decide that?”
- Open questions almost always tell you more — and they are harder to feel attacked by.
PART 2
Saying It Back
Listen to the other side's main point, then write it in your words — not theirs.
1.The other side's main point, as I understood it:
2.I checked with them and they said my summary was: (circle one) ACCURATE | NOT QUITE
3.If it was not quite right, what did I miss?
Clarify — Try to write their point at its strongest, not its weakest. If your summary sounds silly, you have probably summarized a version they would not recognize — and answering that version proves nothing.
PART 3
Asking a Question That Opens Things Up
Write two questions for the other side. Make at least one of them open.
4.My first question:
5.Is it open or closed? What answer do I expect?
6.My second question:
7.Which of my two questions would be harder to answer in one word? Why?
Clarify — A good question is not a trap. If your question only works when the other person answers wrongly, it is a speech with a question mark on the end. Ask something you genuinely do not know the answer to.
PART 4
When They Make a Good Point
This part is the hardest one, and the most useful.
8.Name one thing the other side said that was genuinely fair:
9.Does agreeing with that one point mean I lose the debate? Why or why not?
10.How can I agree with that point and still argue my side?
Clarify — Conceding a small point almost never loses an argument — it usually makes the rest of what you say more believable. Think about which part you can give up without giving up your position.
PART 5
One Thing to Practise
Finish here. Keep it small and specific.
11.One listening habit I want to practice before the next debate:
12.How will I know if it worked?
Clarify — Pick something you could do in a single conversation this week — “let them finish before I answer” beats “be a better listener”, because you can tell afterwards whether you did it.
💡 Tips for You: Listening Is Half of Arguing
- Say their point back before you answer it. If they agree you got it right, your reply lands much harder.
- A good question asks for a reason, not a yes. “Why do you think that?” opens far more than “Do you agree?”
- Conceding a fair point makes you look stronger. It shows you were listening. It is not the same as losing.
Reflection
When did someone last change your mind because they listened well? Which is harder for you — hearing the other side accurately, or admitting a point of theirs is fair? What will you try in your next debate?
— End of Worksheet —
Bring this to your next session and talk it through.
FOR MENTOR USE — STUDY THIS TOGETHER
Mentor Guide
How to run this worksheet, use the hints, and review it together
1. What this builds
Debate worksheets 1–4 build the case. This one builds the half that decides whether a debate is a conversation or two speeches in the same room: hearing the other side accurately, asking a question that gets a reason rather than a yes, and conceding a fair point without treating it as a defeat.
2. Running it
- Read the part headings aloud together before the student starts. Knowing the shape of the sheet lowers the cost of starting.
- There are no wrong answers on the fill-in lines — this is the student's own thinking, not a test.
- Every working part has a Clarify hint. The student should try the part first and read the hint only if stuck. It gives a strategy, never words to copy.
- If a line stays blank, that is information. Ask what made it hard rather than filling it in for them.
3. What to watch for
- A summary in Part 2 that makes the other side sound foolish. That is the straw-man reflex, and it is worth naming gently — ask them to write the version the other person would actually sign.
- Questions in Part 3 that are really statements. “Don't you think it's unfair that…” is a speech. Ask what they would learn from the answer.
- Part 4 is where students often freeze, because conceding feels like losing. Say plainly that strong debaters concede small points on purpose — it buys credibility for the points they will not concede.
- A student who cannot name anything fair the other side said usually has not listened yet, rather than facing an opponent with no good points.
4. Reviewing it
Review with the student, not by marking the page. Ask them to read one answer aloud and say why they wrote it — the reason matters more than the wording.
Finish by agreeing one specific thing to try before the next session. Write it on the last line so it is not lost.